Saturday, 18 February 2012

The Woman in Black

About 4 years ago, The Wig and I took ourselves off to Theatre land for a Matinee performance of 'The Woman in Black'. I had just sold my BMX on eBay and bought us tickets as a treat. I have no idea why I owned a BMX at the age of 32. Anyway, it was an absolutely brilliant performance, probably the best play I have ever seen and left us completely terrified despite it being only 2pm in the afternoon.

Last night, The Wig and I took ourselves off to the new Hackney Picture House for the screen adaptation of the same story and I can safely say I s**t myself. It is more scary than the 2 scary things on my scary barometer. One being the 'Thriller' Video and the other being the Ghost Train at the end of Brighton Pier. Things touch you on your face, its horrible. 'The Woman in Black' by the newly revived Hammer Film Productions is a gillion times worse than either of these things.

The fact that it is rated a 12 certificate is crazy in my view. Kids these days must be so hard! I actually can't sleep as I'm sill thinking about it and am to scared to go to the toilet. It's very dark in the hallway en route to the bathroom. The Wig and I watched 3/4 of the film with our coats over our heads and I had to make emergency ear plugs out of a Kleenex so I couldn't hear it. Loud noises scare the crap out of me and I have bat like hearing apparently. I don't want to spoil anything as you really must check it out for yourselves but the film has all the right components to scare you to death. Or at least scare you into making emergency earplugs out of Kleenex. The film features:

* An old dilapidated house
* Creepy Children
* Victorian Mechanical toys
* Eerie music
* Screams
* Taxidermy Monkey's

I've never seen that Harry Potter chap in anything before, and I have to say that his acting ability isn't stretched too much in this film as there isn't really much dialogue, but he's not too bad in it. The main thing about the film is that it is so damn frightening, or "f****ing terrifying" as The Wig exclaimed when we left the cinema. So even if you are put off by Radcliffe, give it a chance, I still think you should see it. I'm going to give it 10 Squawking Crows out of a possible 10 and urge you to check it out for yourself. Although I suggest packing earplugs and a clean pair of under crackers for your cinema visit.

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